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"Ask Sarah" Wedding Etiquette and Advice

So you're getting married and you probably have questions.  I have answers!  Hi, I'm Sarah - a woman who is passionate about weddings. 

Ask Sarah Article:  Planning a Bachelorette Party. How to help your maid-of-honor plan your bachelorette party!

The Bachelorette Party – lets discuss this super fun night that’s dedicated just to you and your last night of being single with your closest girlfriends (if it's the night before your wedding of course!). Let me share with you how you can help make planning this event a lot easier for your maid-of-honor/bridal party. These types of parties are supposed to be geared towards you, the bride.  Now you might assume that your closest girlfriends will know exactly what you would and would not want to happen at this party, but since the subject of “what would you want your bachelorette party to be like” doesn’t happen very often your girls may only have their likes/dislikes to pull from. So, I would suggest dispelling the guessing games and doubt and let your ladies know your wishes. These parties no longer have to be crazy nights out, and ‘special visitors’ during the evening, but if you do not communicate what you want to your girls, be prepared for whatever they plan and whatever THEY believe is o.k. (which may end up in disappointment on both ends). Let me offer up some ideas from some research I have done, and some parties I have thrown:

ü      Spa Day and lunch with your girls

ü      Vegas! (Be sure your ladies can afford this!  If you really want it, chip in some cash to make it happen if necessary)

ü      Hiking (if that’s your thing)

ü      Ski Weekend

ü      Classy, elegant dinner where everyone has to pull out their black cocktail dresses

ü      Dinner and fun bachelorette games at someone’s house

ü      Night out on the town with your ladies, being chauffeured in a stretch limo

You can see the possibilities and ideas are endless. Just think of what you’re favorite thing to do is, and give your ladies some guidelines.  I know they would much rather throw a party that you would like and that celebrates you, rather than throwing a party that upsets or embarrasses you, or that you just plain don’t have fun at. Another thing to keep in mind is the guest list. Be realistic on this one, a bachelorette party (to stay reasonable and not have to accommodate too many different people) should be kept to around 10 girls. You want your closest gals there, and those who are there for you. Once you start inviting everyone you end up having people there that “don’t want” to participate and aren’t willing to mingle and help make it a fun night. Avoid this by inviting all the acquaintances and not-so-close friends to the bridal shower instead. 

One last thing I’d like to mention… this party usually ends up being pretty expensive.  So if you’re asking for a limo, a nice dinner, etc… again be sensitive to the bridal party and their funds.  I know that when I get married I want a killer party, so I am going to upfront give up some cash for it.  Not because I don’t believe that my girls will be able to afford it, but because I know I want an unforgettable time, and I don’t want my girls to stress over it.  Especially when it comes to Limos – these can be very expensive and if your hearts set on it you may want to say “here’s some cash for the limo, because I’d really like to have one.”  This is not expected, because this party is in fact the responsibility of your maid-of-honor, but definitely a nice gesture.  Some of your girls may refuse, but you can still offer.  Oh and don’t forget to give your girls your lingerie sizes – that way no one has to guess when buying you presents. C’mon girls you know we all want presents. 

-Sarah

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